The Respite

Breathe…

What a wild ride these last few months.  I am amazed at my calendar looking back at me with the word “April” on the header.  April? For real?

The big move, which went on for too many weeks, is finally over. I’m still covered in boxes and don’t have a place for so much stuff. Until I get more settled I will feel a bit of dicontent. The BP result is that I have a very hard time dealing with discontent and I can’t see the forest for the trees to tackle unpacking very well. One box at  a time has been how I’ve tried to keep myself from spiraling to full meltdown.  Still, all that being said I’m in love with my new home. I want to do everything to it all at once, paint, decorate…that takes time. Getting unpacked must come first so patience is definitely a necessity – true character flaw of mine. 

Work is getting more and more challenging but/and I was promoted. Great news but comes with greater demands. From myself more than anything.  I now feel like I shouldn’t ask for help anymore, like I’m not supposed to ask questions anymore. Stupid I know but it feels that way in my head. I’m afraid people will wonder how I got promoted if I don’t know something. I have issues….

I went to yoga last night and was able to achieve something I’ve never quite been able to do before.  I actually quieted the inferno of my racing thoughts and was able to just be still.  It was amazing to be floating in that void for an hour and a half, I’m surprised I was able to literally check into my body for that long and sustain it.  As I drifted back into reality after the class was over I realized that I have let too many of the therapeutic and creative activities I had effectively insert into my daily regimen fall to the wayside.  Yoga, meditation, blogging… I’ve been caught up in the hustle and bustle so much – out of necessity for sure – but it has become a sacrifice I don’t need to make anymore.

It’s time for a respite, to take a look at where my time is going and where I can make adjustments.  My mental and physical health demand it.

I would love to hear your methods of stillness and how you work it into your day. Meditation? Yoga? Writing? Running maybe?  Send me a tip or two!!

I get to put a pause on my family – snapshots exactly. A famous artist my husband has befriended through his job has offered to shoot us in the park on Sunday. I can’t wait to see our family photos snapped through an artist’s lens. I will have the disk immediately so I will share the experience with you then. 

So the morale of the story? You’re never too busy to take a respite, a pause…to bring yourself back to the present and your awareness of self. Balance. Forever seek it and claw at the hourglass of life’s to-do lists overwhelming you to  sustain it. 

Pause

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6 comments

  1. You’d think writing might be a respite for me, but it’s not. In fact I find writing a stresser. My mind moves in and out and up and down, seeking the right word, editing as I go, changing tone and direction. It’s usually a rough go. Even replying to emails or blog posts.
    I always relax when I’m reading God’s word, especially Psalms. I’ve fallen asleep reading Psalms in the past.
    Walking was a real relaxer for me. I want to get back to it soon as soon as these balance and hearing issues clear up.
    I can also sit on the couch late at night when everyone else is asleep and just veg out, thinking about nothing in particular (dozing off a bit). I can clear my mind that way (of course I don’t have your filing cabinet full of responsibilities). Congratulations, btw, on your long sought promotion. I don’t see how you’re going to stack more stuff on your full-to-overflowing-off-the-table-and-onto-the-floor plate. Take care of the BP and yourself. I’ll be praying for you. Keep me posted on your vegging out.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh no! Writing a stressor?? I can see how that could be though–trying to capture a racing mind in thoughtful or even poetic words–yes perhaps a stressor there. Does music speak to you? That might help… Yes the BP has me in a grip right now, trying to push past it and conquer. I feel like the busier I stay the better I can keep the depression away but I’m very tired so struggling with keeping the break pedal from locking up. I think I’m going to have to give the walks a try…

      Liked by 1 person

      1. When I teach the Family to Family class I always stress with the students, “The most important person in your family is you.” In your family, Amanda, that’s you! We can’t care properly for others until we make sure we’re taking care of ourselves first. Hope that helps. Keep me posted, please on your progress. I will be praying for you. When can we Skype again?

        Liked by 1 person

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