At the risk of sounding like a martyr, I feel put-upon these days. Well… Not really… Maybe. Following along? Yeah, me neither.
I have shit going on in so many directions, shit on my mind, and I’m not really at a mental capacity to deal with any of it at the moment. All that being said, if I break it all down into little pieces…examine them one by one by themselves, none of it is something worth stressing over. Any piece by itself is actually nothing really.
But one drop in the water causes the ripple effect, doesn’t it? Unfortunately my drop in the water right now is mania. Yup. Much like this post, I’m all over the place emotionally. And all of this nothing is overwhelming the hell out of me. I’m not depressed by any means, just zapped I guess is the best description for it.
Every night when I hit the bed I feel as though I haven’t slept in days and wake up feeling like it’s only been an hour. My runs are crap (when I am able to get them in), I haven’t made it to kickboxing in almost two weeks, my porch project is stalled, my house is a wreck, and reading anything has been impossible.
My “Road” has a little guy holding a stop sign in front of me. Get out of my way dude, I’ve got to keep driving!
So I am making little goals for each day to try and get me back on track. Saturday I don’t think I have to be anywhere, so I am going to wake up at the crack of dawn and get to work painting the concrete on my porch. It may sound weird, but I think if I can get that much done, I might feel a little more in control of things. And less overwhelmed -for that simple thing – control. When you feel like you don’t have it, little things like this can make a huge difference.
I sure am hopeful…
What do you do, when you feel overwhelmed, to gain perspective and take back control?