I know, I know I’m on a getaway right now. But I can’t sleep anymore because of the time zone difference and I’m letting the husband get a couple more blessed hours of much needed sleep before our Saturaday adventures here in Las Vegas. So I wanted to describe one of the things that I found very interesting last night and got me mulling around in my overthinking head.
So last night the hubs and I went on a VIP night club crawl in a party bus. Let me just say it was the way to go for nightclubbing in Vegas for sure. I love to dance, hubs could take it or leave it (dancing that is) but he did have a lot of fun. In true Amanda fashion I was fast friends with the fellow VIP-ers and we were off having a good dang time dancing and, well yes, drinking. Hello, it’s Vegas…
For whatever reason, probably because we were the only ones I’m sure, the group was first enamored with hubs and I and the fact that we were a married couple of 15+ years and “you guys are adorable together” and all that mess. But one of the girls, and this is where I begin my pondering ponderness, was hell-bent on sending me a message. Run. Men are scum and you should just run as fast as you can. Get out while you can. Yup, her words.
Yes, she was incredibly intoxicated, but it made me sad for her. Genuinely sad, not pity or judgement. She obviously had been hurt very badly and saw it a public service to save me from, what she saw, was pending and inevitable pain. While not quite as direct, I noticed as the ladies drank more and more, they became well, man haters. It was so not directed at me or the hubs, it was just a generalization based on their own experiences I guess.
I don’t know the true statistic here, but isn’t the divorce rate incredibly high these days? I think too many people give up when the prettiness of being a couple fades and it becomes a real effort to work at being a partnership. It’s almost like my generation treats marriage like buying a house. 10-15 years and it’s time to let it go back to the bank or something. It makes me sad truly, because I see the beauty in what real work actually can amount to–amazingness. If I could share it with the world I would. See! This is the result of hard work, forgiveness, compassion, compromise, and respect, and you can all have happiness too!! Maybe I’m just being an idealist, but I really feel like I want to give a conference on this happy juice I’m sipping. And hey-when in the hell did we stop being confident in ourselves? Ok that’s another post for another time, I think…
Don’t get me wrong it’s not rainbows and butterflies all of the time. In fact hubs was getting on my nerves so bad on the travel out here I wanted to smack him in the head. But the deep inset feeling is thankfulness, security, and happiness. And I think when I look at him that I could have very easily and justifiably walked away, but am so very very thankful I didn’t. I wouldn’t know this if I had. And this is so good. Would I have been bitter if I had? Hmm, no I don’t think so – that was the gift of my “jump”. But I don’t know if I would have imagined something like what we have now was a possibility-with him or anyone else.
So I’m rambling at this point I know and thanks for getting this far. I don’t feel like I have all of the answers at all, I promise I don’t. But I do have my experience, mine alone, and if it just helps one person have a little hope, maybe less bitterness and faith in the partnership of love, well hell yes.
So I hope you look at your partner on this beautiful day and tell them how thankful you are for them. Even if, and maybe especially if, they’re being obnoxious or aloof, maybe they just need to hear it from your mouth and see it in your eyes.
Happy juice. I told you, lol! Back to sipping… Happy Saturday!